


I Know This Feeling, Oh So, I Feel It In My Bones

by Velocity_Owl87



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Abortion Discussion, Alternate Universe - Always a Different Sex, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, BAMF Stiles Stilinski, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Genderswap, Male-Female Friendship, Past Abuse, Teen Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-06
Updated: 2012-11-06
Packaged: 2017-11-18 02:39:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/555963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Velocity_Owl87/pseuds/Velocity_Owl87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Izzy was fine with being a werewolf, it was better than the life she had led as a human. But when a few mistakes come back to destroy her tenuous new existence, she has no other recourse but to look outside her pack. Despite her reluctance to ask for help, Stiles gives it to her, showing her that not everyone is out to harm her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Know This Feeling, Oh So, I Feel It In My Bones

**Author's Note:**

> I started this one awhile back, intrigued by the idea of a female Isaac and her reactions to males after growing up in such an abusive environment. Not to mention how her standards for affection and how to handle niceness would be messed up. So this is a basically not happy exploration of a situation that sadly is repeated too damned often.

  
It wasn't melodramatic when she found out. She was actually pretty composed and calm as it went. Sure, she was gripping the edges of the toilet seat tight enough that her knuckles were turning white...but overall, she was congratulating herself on not freaking, freaking out like she wanted to do.

The alarm on her phone beeped and she snatched up the plastic tube from the toilet paper roll holder and laughed hollowly.

So this was the monster of the week for her.

When it all came down to it, the situation was so mundane that she would have laughed if she hadn't been so freaked out.

For once it wasn't a matter of wolves getting her, or kanimas or hunters with problems trying to take it out on her. No.

It was oversight. Or carelessness. or maybe the belief in her own invincibility.

It didn't matter in the end. Only that she was now dealing with the consequences and she had no idea how to proceed.

"Iz? You all right?"

She swallowed hard and snapped out of her daze at the sound of Stiles' voice. Of course, he'd be the one to make sure she's okay because he hasn't seen her out with the others for at least an hour or so.

"Yeah. Just...give me a sec."

She wasn't okay and she didn't think she was going to be for awhile. But she can pretend. Just like she had always done.

Even if she had Stiles hovering outside, his concern fairly overpowering and strong enough for her to feel through the door, she was still more or less alone. He wasn't the one that would be there with her at the clinic or at the doctor's offices. Stiles was a friend. Had become even more so during the past few months...but she wasn't going to rely on him.

Nor was she going to expect for him to help anyways. She had learned long ago to stop relying and expecting help. If she was going to get through anything, it was going to be through her own will and effort.

She took a deep breath and crammed the test back in the box and shoved it in the plastic bag before throwing it deep into the wastebasket. After that, she splashed some water on and threw some make up on. Nothing much, but just enough to hide the dark circles and bloodless lips.

She threw the door open and adjusted her messenger bag on her shoulder and came face to face with Stiles. He looked at her thoughtfully, with that blank-faced look he usually got when he was trying to figure out a difficult problem.

She tried to not fidget or appear nervous in front of him, even though she was sure that he could hear her heart thumping. She could certainly hear it, loud and insistent in her ears.

But he only nodded and moved to give her space as they walked back to the empty classroom where they had set up camp to do some extra study for the test looming ahead in chemistry.

She gave a small prayer of thanks that he didn't notice her nervousness. Or that if he did, he had the good grace to not comment on it. Izzy knew that she wouldn't get much more of a reprieve after that.

At least with Stiles at her side, talking about everything a mile a minute; she would have some time to get used to the new situation that was living under her skin.

And figure out what she was going to do about it without Derek knowing.

They sit down and Izzy opened her book and pulled out a pencil, ready to get to work on the problems when she noticed that Stiles hadn't even touched his book or his notebook.

"Hey, Izzy...I know we're not really close...but if you can't talk to anyone, I'll listen. I can actually keep my mouth for a longer stretch than a couple of minutes."

Izzy blinked at Stiles' offer and pressed her lips together, noticing the tackiness of the lipgloss she'd smeared on her lips to make them look normal. The taste too, was apparent and she was surprised she wasn't noticed it before. It was overwhelming and cloying and enough to make her stomach rebel.

Without another word,she launched herself out of her seat and knelt by the waste bin to empty out her stomach. She vomited so violently that she didn't notice Stiles was at her side with wet wipes and a bottle of water until she mercifully was done.

"How long?" Stiles asks her softly as he hands the wipes and bottle over. Izzy wipes her mouth and takes a drink to rinse out her mouth before she takes a long pull from the bottle.

"A month. Maybe two." She answered because she knew it was pointless. Stiles knew that something was wrong and he was quick to put two unrelated things together. He had seen how she had looked at Derek in unguarded moments and even though he had been cryptic, he had understood how she felt about him.

"Are you going to tell him?"

He helped her to get her feet and walked her over to her seat, the work forgotten as her pregnancy had now come to light. She shrugged and picked at seams of her cheap jeans. She hadn't really thought to tell him, if she was honest.

She didn't even know if she was going to go through with it.

She looked up at Stiles and for a split second, wished that it had been him instead of Derek that she had fallen in bed with. They could have been good together. Even as young as they were, she knew Stiles was more mature than even Derek. He would have been good for her.

But that was done. She had made her choice, when Derek had pulled her out of the grave that she had been digging.

He had saved her from the constant abuse and she hadn't thought twice about offering herself to him when the nights were too damned lonely.She knew what she was doing. She had bought condoms for that purpose. But her father had never let her be on the pill and as she now realized, a few broken condoms did add up in the end.

"Have you thought about what you're going to do?"

Stiles pressed again, despite knowing that Izzy's mind probably hadn't even gotten to that stage just yet.

Izzy looked up and shook her head.

"I don't have any money for anything." She replied, making Stiles wince. Even if they settled her father's death with the insurance company and had a trust for her...she probably was flat broke until it came through.

"I'm sorry." He said instead and ends up wrapping his arms around her shoulders. She felt fragile, all long bones and thin skin against him and it makes his heart crack. He wished he could do something to make it better, but there's nothing. He didn't have that kind of cash lying around.

"Thank you." Izzy whispered and clung onto him, even though he could easily break him in half. She needed this so badly that she could taste it, but didn't know who or how to ask for it.

~*~*~*~

"Why do you smell like Stiles and milk?" Erica asked her the minute that she entered the train depot.

She should have known that Erica would be the one to make some kind of comment about that. She could see Boyd look up and Derek visibly bristle at the comment, but they all remained silent. All of them wanted to hear what she had to say about that.

"We were studying after school. I got sick after drinking some milk."

She had perfected the skill of lying with enough truth in it to make it believable and she could see that it had worked by the way that Erica sniffed and walked away while Boyd just went back to ignoring them all. She let herself relax slightly until she realized that Derek was still as tense as he had been since she came in. But she also knew that it was something he didn't want to have out in front of the others. So technically, she was safe.

But it didn't mean that it was comfortable. Not to mention dangerous, if he decided to train them that night. She still hadn't forgotten the broken arm he had made worse the first time they had trained with him. It had healed, but the memory of it remained.

Despite her reluctance and fear for the being she carried, she didn't want to willingly destroy it. She would kill to survive. But not kill because she simply could.

She moved to the area she had claimed as her own and sat down on the cracked and worn vinyl. She was exhausted and she needed to sleep, even though all of her instincts screamed at her to stay awake and alert. Something was bound to go down between her and Derek and she had to keep all her wits about her when it finally did.

She blinked rapidly to stave off the grittiness in her eyes when Derek actually broke the silence.

"Isabel,I need to talk to you. Boyd, Erica, go home. They're lying low for tonight."

Erica looked horribly affronted and Izzy was sure that if Derek hadn't been there, she would have caught shit. Erica wasn't taking Derek's disinterest in her all that well and had begrudged Izzy that simple fact ever since she had been bitten. Izzy hadn't even tried to explain, since she knew that anything she would have said would have made Erica angrier than she already was.

They left, but Derek didn't say anything for awhile. Izzy knew it was to make sure Boyd and Erica were well and truly gone. It didn't stop it from making her nervous and it showed by how much she was fidgeting as she waited for Derek to finally lay it out on the line.

"You're pregnant, aren't you?" Derek asked her bluntly, making her wince. But she nodded, unable to not answer or lie.

Derek sighed heavily and walked away from her, as if she had a disease he could catch.

"I'm sorry."

She had blink at the apology. Out of all the things she had expected to hear from him, that wasn't it.

"I can't keep you here. Not in that state. Have you decided what you're going to do?"

Izzy shook her head. "I just found out today."

Derek nodded and crossed his arms.

"Who else knows?"

She swallowed hard.

"Stiles."

Derek nodded and grabbed his jacket.

"Grab your coat. We owe him a visit."

~*~*~*~

"Wow. Well. You certainly don't ask for much, do you?"

Stiles asked as Izzy sat primly on the edge of his bed while Derek stood to the side.

"Where else can she go?"

Stiles and Izzy both winced. Derek was right about that. If Izzy was found out, she'd be in the system so fast none of them would be able to say bye. And the complications of a baby and being a werewolf away from her pack...

"I still don't understand why you can't get your creeper ass and apartment and man up." Stiles shot back, making Derek's eyes go red for just a moment. Izzy stood up and moved closer to Stiles. She wasn't sure if she could possibly go against her alpha if he lost it enough to attack, but she wasn't going to stand by and let him.

Especially not when they were asking him for such a large favour.

"They'd find me, Stiles. Hunters, Alphas. What do you think they'd do to her?"

Stiles sighed and looked at Izzy, his expression unreadable to her. She knew that he was struggling with the situation. He cared for her and he knew full well that Derek was manipulating those emotions to have him take responsibility for Izzy and his unborn child. A responsibility that for numerous reasons; he simply wouldn't take up. 

Stiles was silent for several minutes, his eyes unfocused as he weighed the pros and cons in his mind before he finally exhaled loudly and nodded. 

"Thanks Stiles."

Stiles shook his head at Derek's uninflected words before he turned to him instead. 

"You owe me, big time and let me be clear on this: I'm doing it because Isabel is my friend. Always has been before all this happened."

Derek shrugged and turned to Izzy, who was feeling all kinds of horrible at having had to put Stiles in such a situation. And for not being strong enough to go against her Alpha when she had realized what exactly he had in mind for her and her child. 

"I'll call you later."

Izzy forced herself to smile and nod, but she knew that he wouldn't. Not on his own imperative, at least. 

He left without another word and Stiles again wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close. 

"We'll figure something out, Iz. Don't worry. It's going to be fine. I don't know how or when, but it's going to be."

Iz swallowed hard against the lump in her throat and nodded. 

The words, she was sure, weren't just meant for her, but for Stiles as well and at least one of them had to believe them.

 


End file.
